Freakin Weird Blog

August 15, 2005
Amtrak Mooning

If any of you have traveled by public transport recently, you'll probably have some understanding of at least one of the following two points:
a) A train or a bus that arrives on time is about as common as a five legged Panda-Dodo hybrid.
b) Many public transportation employees have "something of the Dahmer (Jeffrey)" about them.

The issue with public transportation is that it has a public image problem. In a nation obsessed with cars and air travel, it's hard to put faith in a service which many deem to be old fashioned, and inconvenient.

But as transportation chiefs attempt to woo the public back onto buses and trains, things such as this probably won't help them earn the respect of the general public.

Every year people flock to Laguna Niguel in Orange County, California to participate in the Annual Mooning of Amtrak event. On the second Saturday of each July, an eager crowd of mooners synchronize belts and zippers and release their cheeks as Amtrak trains roar by.

After 8pm you can witness another giant leap for mankind, when the "night mooning" session begins. People are encouraged to bring lanterns for the evening session, so that the bevy of backsides can be bathed in soft, warm light.

Men and women are all welcome, and if you should fall asleep - don't worry. There's a good chance you'll wake up at the crack of Dawn.

Image from here

posted by Dr. Wei, PhD 16:45 E-MAIL THIS POST

August 8, 2005
The Clone Wars

It was the great French philosopher Jean Paul Sartre who uttered the words "Hell Is Other People." For a man who never had the pleasure of riding on a rush-hour New York City commuter train, or who never waited in line at a Krispy Kreme when the red neon light is glowing, this was quite a prophetic statement.

But I have to find myself agreeing with him. People are generally a very annoying species, and these days it's becoming crystal clear that there are just too many of them.

With that in mind, I got ever-so-slightly edgy when I read how a South Korean company has "produced" the world's first cloned dog. Snuppy the pooch was created after scientists used skin cells taken from the ear of a three-year-old Afghan hound called Tai to create multiple embryos.

In a quote that could have been taken right out of a 50 Cent record, the journal NATURE reported that the South Korean team had transplanted more than 1,000 embryos into 123 bitches. Out of the three resulting pregnancies, one was successful and dear Snuppy was born.

The vocal majority who oppose cloning tend to be against it on moral grounds, but another argument that's often touted is the danger of a crazed dictator like Adolf Hitler, or Saddam Hussein cloning himself and plunging the world into war and chaos. But that's not why it worries me. I'm concerned about something far closer to home. I'm worried that the man on the train who chews gum like a dribbling camel is going to clone himself. Or the woman who sits next to me on the bus and shouts Italian recipes down her mobile phone. Or the 17-year-old mother who's ramming my shins with the front of her baby carriage.

If ordinary people decided to clone ourselves, we're going to really be in trouble. A world full of multiple Franks, Daves, Sharons and Erics is far more worrisome than a couple of Iraqi dictators with moustaches. We need to nip this madness in the bud now, otherwise we're going to be clone out of luck.

posted by Dr. Wei, PhD 15:00 E-MAIL THIS POST

July 29, 2005
Burger Man

Question: What happens when you combine history with heart attacks?
Answer: You get the International Burger Hall of Fame

Located in Daytona Beach, Florida, this shrine to sweating meat was the brainchild of "Hamburger" Harry Sperl. A German native, Sperl decided that cultural life in America was much in need of a hefty shot of cholesterol to the arm. As a result, he opened the Burger Museum, which contains over 1,000 hamburger-related items, ranging from waterbeds to motorcycles.

Some may think he's one slice of cheese short of a Double Swissburger Deluxe Flatliner Special, but I believe we should be embracing the burger with open, spatula-like hands, not shunning it.

Coming next week, look out for The Museum of Fried Chicken Shaped Like Slightly Rude Body Parts, and a new online exhibit called "Presidential Kebobs".

Picture from here.

posted by Dr. Wei, PhD 09:17 E-MAIL THIS POST

July 27, 2005
Ears and Eggs

If time is really such a precious commodity, why do people spend half their lives pouring it down the drain? There are a host of statistics out there – all of which I'm too lazy to research – that reveal things such as "the average human spends 12.4 years of his life in the bathroom". As annoyingly dull as these statistics are, the point is that we waste a lot of our time on unavoidable, mundane stuff – like sitting on the toilet, or shaving.

Then add-in the fact that about one third of the day is wasted on having to work a job, then more time is lost commuting to work, and yet more is dribbled away sleeping.

But that's not the end of it. Half of our conversations are with people we don't even want to talk to – so that's a few more hours lost – then there's shopping for groceries, mowing the lawn. Geez, come to think of it three quarters of our life is already spent. So that one free quarter we have – the precious, priceless block of time that we can do whatever we want with... surely it's something we'd really want to make the most of.

So if that's true, I have to keep asking myself why somebody would choose to voluntarily attempt to pull a car with his ears while standing on a large number of eggs.

Apparently Zhang Xingquan, 38, pulled the car for about 20 metres in Dehui, China. Exactly why he did this is unknown, but thankfully he didn't break any of the eggs.

Weird.

Picture from here

posted by Dr. Wei, PhD 16:18 E-MAIL THIS POST

July 25, 2005
Soap Lady and the Giant Colon

A liver the size of Iowa. Artery walls harder than diamond-tipped drills. Lungs like wrinkled weather balloons. To many, these would seem like strange physiological miracles. To me, they're just the results of yet another yearly medical.

But there's no doubt that human bodies ARE very weird. All it takes is for a few cells in the wrong place to start getting a little bit hyper, and suddenly you've developed an extra limb or woken up to find your internal organs are like over-ripe bananas.

So for fans of medical curiosities, check out the Mutter Museum in Philadelphia, PA. This collection of weird and wonderful pathological specimens will have you gagging in delight as the crushing reality dawns of just how weird Mother Nature can be.

You'll never eat another bran flake again once you’ve witnessed the spellbinding Giant Colon, a staggeringly swollen organ that looks like it belongs in a zombie horror film. Or maybe The Soap Woman is more your thing – the body of a woman who was buried in the 19th century and, due to some quirky chemical reaction, turned into a giant bar of Irish Spring.

From brains to baby deformities, any pre-held belief that humans are the perfect species will be shattered once you leave this museum. Some people will look at the exhibits and think they're shocking. Others will just think of their neighbors. I guess it just depends how small your hometown is.

Image from here.

posted by Dr, Wei, PhD 16:17 E-MAIL THIS POST